Beth's Posts, From the YCC book

Self Confidence, How To Get It

Confidence

Are you wondering what’s at the base of self-confidence? It’s you! If you don’t think much of yourself, you probably have low self-esteem or self-confidence.

As we go through life, there are lots of different scenarios that occur, and if things don’t work as we want, it often impacts feelings we have about ourselves. Regardless of your situation, you can improve your self-confidence by changing the way you think about yourself.

How do you become more confident?

Ask the question, ‘What do I want?’ When you ask yourself that question, don’t spend time on the ‘how do I get it?’ because your energy needs to stay focused on the ‘what.’

A simple example might be having a good outcome at a meeting. Spend time thinking about how you would like the meeting to turn out. What’s your motivation for the outcome of the meeting? How does it feel when you imagine the outcome you desire? This is how you can begin to create a positive self-image purposefully.

Don’t spend time thinking about what can go wrong

In the example above, don’t think of people who can disrupt your meeting, derogatory comments someone may make or anything that distracts you from what you desire. If you’re spending time distracted with negative outcomes, it dilutes your positive energy.

As you start to build up a series of ‘wins,’ your self-confidence will get stronger.

Start Small

Take time to think about an outcome you desire. Imaging yourself participating in your scenario and how it feels to achieve it. Spend your time doing this and eliminate the negative ‘I can’t’ thoughts.

Throughout your day, notice your thoughts. If you find yourself thinking negatively about what you want, stop yourself and replace it with thoughts about the good outcome. It takes some practice, but in time it becomes easier.

The best part is you don’t need anyone’s permission to do it. Just your desire to make the change.

2 thoughts on “Self Confidence, How To Get It

  1. Yes, I agree that it’s helpful to think ahead about the ideal outcome we’d like to see, along with being open to additional unexpected benefits we might reap just by being present in a giving and receiving exchange. And I love your reminder that we don’t need permission . . . just the desire!

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