Recently I got a call from Tony, the calm mechanic who works on my Porsche. He said my Boxster is broken. The engine failed, and it is worth nothing more than scrap metal.
What???? What the heck does engine failure mean? We just had it serviced last summer!
He started to list all the things that broke, “There is no compression in any of the cylinders, the IMS bearing failed.” He kept explaining, “It’s not worth going further. I’m really sorry. It’s such a good looking car.”
It was a beautiful car. I loved it. I drove it all the time with the top down. I enjoyed the feeling of the fresh air and sunshine on my face. Back in 2001, Beth and I bought it and drove off the dealer’s lot in Newport Beach, California.
Since then, the car has represented both good times and hard times. On many occasions, Beth and I would jump in and go for a ride through the hills or along the coast. It was such fun to get away and drive someplace.
When times were good, the Boxster reflected our success. There is nothing like driving a fast, beautiful convertible along a narrow, twisting mountain road to feel like you are on top of the world.
When times were tough, I felt I wasn’t good enough for the Porsche, and I would leave it in the garage for long stretches. That’s when I opted to drive the Ford Explorer. The big old SUV favored by the yard guys seemed to be a better reflection of me when I was feeling low.
Over the past few years, Beth and I have grown in our understanding of ourselves.
Not that long ago, I started to notice I’m ready for a new car. We test drove a new Tesla and loved it. Maybe just a little big for me, but it felt great. We put the purchase on hold. We still had some work to do.
The week before Tony’s call, I decided to clean up the Boxster. The leather was looking a little weary, and some of the trim was faded, so I picked up supplies and planned to clean it up over the weekend. I remember thinking to myself, I love this car and I’d like it to look good.
By Sunday I was ready. I spent several hours cleaning and shining up the car. I recently replaced the floor mats and thought maybe I’d order some new trim and get that door ding repaired. I don’t need a Tesla, I have a 2001 Porsche Boxster and it looks so nice!
After it was all cleaned up, I drove it into the garage for what ended up being the last time.
On Monday morning I jumped in and turned the key. I heard a bit of a crank followed by an awful whizzing sound. Mmmm, what does that mean to me, I thought.
After spending more time thinking about that question, I realized I’m done with this phase of my life, and the Boxster was a symbol of it.
The Boxster represented and reflected a big transition in our life from living on a golf course in Southern California to starting, running and selling our software company. It reflected a time of struggle and uncertainty. It also characterized a time when we didn’t realize our thoughts matter, and we can choose them.
We long ago sold the old Ford Explorer – to one of the yard guys. We’ve also let go of much that we’ve associated with our old life. Now it’s time to let go of the Boxster.
The Boxster defined a phase in our life, and that phase is over.
We often prefer the known, even if it doesn’t fit anymore. Even when we’ve been asking for a change, and it shows up, we don’t see it as the opportunity it is.
We forget that for something new to come in, we have to make room for it. We focus on the loss and forget to look forward to what will replace it.
It’s so much easier to complain about the loss of something and the difficulties of making a change. Learning to embrace the moment and be open to what is there is the first step to change. We frequently ignore the new opportunity we have right in front of us – the change we’ve been asking for all along.
For us, it’s time to move on and continue our new and exciting journey.
Are there opportunities awaiting you behind changes occurring in your life that seem to be negative? Consider taking another look at them as the curtain hiding something you’ve been wanting in your life.