Happier, Peter's Posts

Your Three Selves


When you think of who you are and point your finger and say this is me, where do you point? I point to someplace in my mid-chest and say “Here I am.”

When we say “You Can Choose,” we don’t mean just the you that you point to, but the whole you. Let’s call this ‘whole you’ the Whole-Self. The Whole-Self is made up of three selves.

The Active-self is the self we are most familiar with. This is the self that talks and walks and thinks.

The Believing-self is the self that is just below the surface. The Believing-self keeps track of all the rules, patterns, stories and beliefs to deal with life.,

The Greater-self is at a far different level – essentially god-like. It’s still you, with a far, far greater perspective.

I’ll use the analogy of a tree to see if I can make it clear. Like all analogies, it’s not perfect, but hopefully, it can bring some clarity and be useful as we continue to develop these concepts further.


Think of the root system of the tree as the Greater-self. Like the roots of a tree, you don’t usually pay much attention to your Greater-self. The roots provide nourishment, the base foundation and general direction for the tree.


The trunk and branches of the tree represent the Believing-self. The branches grow stronger over time and are slow to change. The branches and your beliefs provide the form and structure to your thoughts and the type of life and experiences you have.


The leaves are like the Active-self. When you look at a tree, you first see the leaves. The leaves come and go but are just as vital to the tree as they guide the growth with their attraction to the sun and provide energy as they convert the sunshine. You can tell the type, health, and vigor of a tree by simply inspecting the leaves. Just like you can tell a lot about a person by what they think about.

All parts of the tree are essential. The leaves, branches, and roots all work together for the tree just all three selves work together for you. You can’t have a tree without some type of root system, branches, and leaves. Just like with our selves, they are all intimately connected without a hierarchy of importance and are equally dependent on one another. Each part also contributes to a healthy or unhealthy tree.

A leaf can only grow where a branch or trunk exists and whether or not the branch thrives is based on the health and productivity of the leaves. The roots provide nutrients and stability; working silently and invisibly.

If you were to ask a tree to point to itself, I wonder where it would point? Maybe each leaf, branch and root would point to itself and say “Here I am.”

All three of selves – the Greater-self, the Believing-self, and the Active-self are involved when you choose.

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