Don’t clap for me
I represent everything you are trying to abolish
I’m white, I’m male, and benefit from both
Don’t clap for me
Even though I’m not racist, I now know that’s not enough
I have black friends and support liberal causes, but finally, see my hypocrisy
Don’t clap for me
I’m guilty of sitting quietly on the sidelines, not wanting to get involved
Hoping others will implement the changes I know we need
Don’t clap for me
I’ve witnessed wrong and chose to do nothing
Watching while they avert their eyes and do what they must
Don’t clap for me
I’m not here to take credit, it’s me who’s to blame
For allowing you to suffer while I slide on through
Don’t clap for me
For it’s you who deserves the praise for persevering through daily adversity I can’t fathom
And see a future where justice prevails
I clap for you
As together we build a society where race no longer consumes the air
Where all are free to bring their experience and perspectives to manifest our new future

I wrote this after coming home from attending my first #BLM rally. It was attended by over a hundred people as we gathered to learn, share, and be with each other as we all try to deal with the current events.

As the speakers took the stage to share their messages of hope, despair, fear, and love, I wondered if there was a place for someone like me to talk. If I would have gotten up on stage, I knew I didn’t want applause. I chose not to – I felt I didn’t belong and was way too afraid. Instead, I wrote this as a way of expressing my feelings and hoping to connect with others who want to engage, but are unsure.