When You Don’t Have Clarity

When you have clarity, the world is your oyster. You know exactly what to do and why. Nothing gets in your way because you know you are going in the right direction. Obstacles and challenges are only temporary blimps.

I’ve had clarity for many things in my life, like when I decided to go to school, when I wanted to marry Beth, and most recently when we decided to move to Santa Cruz.

The move to Santa Cruz was both inspired and super easy. In a matter of a few months, it went from a whim to a done deal. All the details worked themselves out. For the most part, the move just flowed. 

The next step was always evident and doable. There were, however, several challenges along the way. We had issues with a few contractors that seemed to make us wait forever to get things done. But even during the wait, I was clear the move was going to happen and knew the roadblocks were temporary.

I haven’t always had clarity. In fact, during much of my life, I felt buffeted about rather than driven by a crystal clear vision of what I wanted.

Life is more fun with clarity

What do you do when you don’t have clarity? How can you get clarity?

We’ve learned that you can have clarity in some parts of your life and not in others. Maybe you know exactly what you want to do for work, but have no idea on how to have a fulfilling relationship. 

It also changes over time; perhaps when you were in school, you knew what you wanted to be and achieve, but as you grew up and gained more experience, your goals and ambitions changed.

Gain clarity by asking questions

Ask detailed, difficult questions about what you want. Then ask yourself more questions. Why do I want what I think I want. What is driving me? What do I expect to get out of it? What happens when I get it? What happens if I don’t?

As you go through and ask and answer these questions, pay attention to how you feel. Your feelings will tell you how truly you believe your answers. Is there passion? Is there trepidation? 

Do something 

Another way to gain clarity is to simply start. The act of taking the first step, any step, will get the wheels turning and allow you to build some momentum. Again, by listening to your feelings, you will get a clear sense for which direction and what actions are the more appropriate ones.

If you want clarity, ask yourself questions about what you want, then listen. You have so much more to tell yourself as you learn to listen and trust.